Monday, March 30, 2009

Zelda lore galore!

Ok, this isn't really for those of you who regularly read my blog, this is for all the zelda fans out there who are exteremely confused as to what the crap is going on in between games. The 3-d ones, anyway. This will be a very long post, so if you're not a zelda fan, or don't have a borderline OCD with the timelines (like me ;P), then there are wiser ways to spend your time.

Firstly, let it just be said that most (all) of this will just be theory and massive nerdery on my part.Secondly, don't freak out about it too much.  I absolutely wrecked my head trying to make sense of twilight princess, and it kinda ruined the game for me. So take everything with a grain of salt, and at the end of the day, if something doesn't make sense or contradicts previous lore in the games, don't think about it. Ignore it.  If you're fighting a giant dragon, don't say "Hey, there haven't been a race of dragons in the Zelda games before!", instead say: "Hey, cool, a dragon.". Learn from my mistakes people. Now that all that is out of the way, let's get right into the hypocrisy of contradicting all that stuff I just said about being halfway normal about it.
Oh, and HUGE SPOILER ALERTS TO FOLLOW.Chapter 1: In the beginning of the beginning.

Ok, so, basically, it all starts off with the 3 godesses, din, fayore, and nayru creating hyrule. Din does the races of people, Nayru creates it so life can exist, and Fayore actually makes the life. Then they vamoose. The place where they left becomes "The Sacred Realm", and the triforce is created when they leave, being housed in the sacred realm(taken from ocarina of time [OoT] Lore, see meeting the princess) . And then for a while, everything is hunky dory. Then word about the triforce gets around, and all hell breaks loose. People get greedy about it, and The Hyrulian Civil War takes place. Amidst the fighting, a Hylian mother decides to try to escape the fighting, for a better chance of life for her baby boy. She flees on horseback to the Kokiri forest, but gets injured along the way. Upon reaching the woods, she asks the Great Deku Tree to take care of her child. Deku tree agrees, sensing that is a "Child of Destiny", and the mother dies. But back to the Civil war. Everyone fights, but a particular group are quite nasty about it, the tribe later known as the Twili, called "Dark Interlopers" at the time. The Godesses create light spirits, and the light spirits decide to end the fighting by punishing the people being the biggest jerks about it, the Dark Interlopers. They are banished to the Realm of twilight. Then, everyone gets along rather nicely, Most of the races unite under the flag of the Royal Family of Hyrule, and everyone hugs and gets high fives. (Hylian mother info taken from Great Deku Sprout, Civil war info taken from Link to the past booklet and Twilight princess scenes).Chapter 2: In the beginning
Ok, Ocarina of time is the first Game, as canonically stated by Shigero Miyamoto himself. And he friggin' invented it, so I'd say he knows. Game starts off with you as the "Child of Destiny" in the above, and you go on an adventure to save the land. I'd talk about the game, but I'll stick to the parts that are confusing. Everything makes sense right up until you come back after getting the third spiritual stone. You reach the gates of hyrule castle town, and everything goes dark. Cue cutscene of Zelda and Impa fleeing, as shown in your dream. Dun dun Duuuuuun! While you were away fighting in Zora's domain, Ganondorf staged a coup against the royal family (which succeeded), in an attempt to get the Ocarina of time. After meeting Ganon, you secretly retrieve the Ocarina of time from the river, and enter the temple of time. You open the door of time, and unbeknownst to you, ganon is watching, you, waiting to make his move. You pull the master sword from the pedestal of time, and a portal opens to the sacred realm. (I always presumed the portal was all that blue light shenanigans). Ganon enters the portal with you, and lays hands on the triforce. Due to his imbalanced heart, the triforce splits in three parts.  Ganondorf gets the triforce of Power, and You and Zelda get the Triforce of Courage and Wisdom, respectively. However, due to your young age, the sage of light, Rauru, kept you in the chamber of the sages for 7 years until you were old enough to seriously kick some ass. Just to say a little on the chamber of the sages, it is housed in the Sacred Realm itself, in the Temple of light, and stands as the last bastion against evil in the sacred realm. The sacred realm isn't really explored much in Ocarina of Time, but it is totally explored in "Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past".

After Ganon gets his hands on the triforce, the sacred realm goes to hell, and ganon comes back with the triforce of Power, intent on kicking Hyrule's collective ass and establishing an eeeeeeevil Kingdom. Which he does. Then after 7 years, you come back intent on kicking Ganon's ass. And now, a word on sages. In Ocarina of time, you have to wake the 6 sages to seal ganondorf in the sacred realm. But Rauru says that the temple of light was built by the "Ancient Sages", which seems to note a difference between the six sages and the Ancient Sages. That'll be important for later nitpicking. You Awaken the sages, kick ganon's ass, and then, Zelda does something that will drive future Zelda fans insane for centuries to come.  She sends Link Back to his original time, back 7 years, to his childhood. This creates two timelines, and here is where the madness sets in.

Chapter 3: The Child Timeline

This is the timeline for Link, when he is sent back to his past. It is important to note that he still possesses the triforce, as seen here , right at the very end. That will be important later. Link is sent back 7 years, and as seen in the final cutscene, Zelda reacts in exactly the same fashion  as to the cutscene when you first meet her. This is up for dispute, and is my personal theory, which is where I could be wrong, but it makes enough sense to me. She's got fancy sage magic, she could wrap up any loose ends. So, you are sent back 7 years to the time when you leave Kokiri Forest, off to meet the princess. You warn Zelda about Ganon's Plot (See 2:29), and then depart to try and find your old fairy friend Navi, who departed at the end of Ocarina of Time, and run into the Skull Kid, who robs you of your Ocarina, causes hell, and leads you into an alternate dimension known as termnia, for the adventure known as "Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask". That adventure is just great and awesome, and you return to Hyrule. At some point, Ganon goes through with his coup d'etat, only this time, with forewarning, the Royal Family is prepared. Ganon is captured and excecuted.

Only not quite. Ganon posesses the Triforce of Power, and thus, seemingly returns to life, kills the ancient sage of water, and is all set to go on a slaughterfest, when the Ancient Sages notice something. Just for a word on the Ancient Sages, Rauru notes a difference between the Ancient Sages, who built the temple of light in the sacred realm, and the 6 sages needed to seal away ganondorf in the sacred realm. So I presume these are the guys that Rauru was talking about. Anyway, back to the story. The sages notice that Ganondorf is standing right smack dab in the middle of the device used to seal away the Dark Interlopers, the Twili, who were sealed into the Twilight Realm for causing such rucus during the Hyrulian Civil war.  The sages activate the Mirror of Twilight, and Ganondorf is banished to the Realm of Twilight. Things seems to be cool for a while, and cake and punch is enjoyed by all. Except for the ancient sage of Water, Because he is dead.
Now, for a word on how the heck Ganondorf got his grubby mitts on the Triforce of Power. In the Child Timeline, Ganondorf never touched the triforce, and so he should never have obtained it. However! I also said that Link still has the triforce of courage, marked on the back of his hand, when he returns to his childhood, so there is a problem there. There can only be one triforce of courage obviously, so here where fact turns into theory, I suppose, As I said before, I could be wrong on the theory stuff. When someone touches the triforce, if their heart is imbalanced, it will split into three, and the other two pieces will find the two people most suited to each piece of the triforce. So logically, if Link went back in time still possessing the triforce of courage, the existing triforce would have split up as if it had been touched, and the triforce would have gone to it's other two respective owners, ala Zelda and Ganondorf. At any rate, this post is about 2 months late and I've totally lost my place, so here it is, Lorcan's post on Zelda Lore in all it's unfinished glory. And why yes, I totally and completely did ignore the early games and most all gameboy games. Rejoice!

"......"- Link

Wednesday, March 25, 2009


"WHY? WHY HAVE THEY DONE THIS TO US? WHAT DID WE EVER DO TO THEM? I've.... I've always, I've always been faithful, haven't I, Grant? We've.. We've always been faithful, haven't we? They... Why? Why would they do this to us? We've done nothing wrong! Tell me we don't deserve this, grant. Tell me we deserve better than this. WHY? WHY? WHAT HAVE WE DONE TO DESERVE THIS?" These were the words I spoke to my brother, as he cradled me in his arms, controller still in hand. "What Lorcan? What happened? What's wrong?"

I will bring you back with me 5 minutes. I was reading TV tropes. I like TV tropes. I was reading this page . Then I read the line at the bottom. One solitary word escaped past my lips, taking the last remnants of my sanity along with it, my lucidity had become evanescent in lieu of this dark, WIKCED. WICKED EVIL INFORMATION. "No. "

"As of January 15th, he's slated to play Spike Spiegel in the recently announced live-action adaptation of Cowboy Bebop produced by 20th Century Fox. Fingers crossed that he handles it better than Mark Wahlberg did with Max Payne..."

God help us. God help us all. I raced to Wikipedia, desperate to reveal this as a hoax, a sham, for life to still have meaning, for the knowledge that the sun would indeed rise again. No. No sun., only blackness. Cowboy Bebop is my favorite anime. It was my first anime. My father introduced me and my brother to it, and in this way we went from children to men.  Even if it was only for 30 minutes a week, we were men.I will not try to share with you what is was, for words cannot do it justice.  It is like a Passionate kiss, or the first sight of your firstborn child, it must be experienced.

And now, 20th Century fox have... decided to make a live action film of it. And to play the role of Spike Spiegel, the protaganist, around whom the plot, life, and love of the entire story orbit like so many beautiful, mysterious planets, for this, they have cast.... The bile rises in my throat as I type this.  They... they have cast... Keanu Reeves.  This knowledge passes weightily from me, as though I just informed someone of their father's death. 

My Brother and I shared a scream, a yell of pain, so deep, it seemed to come from the very core of suffering itself. I said in closing, as though to seal up this affront to all things good in this world, "Why have they done this? Why do they rape all I love?  I don't go to the Fox excecutive's house and force his wife to have sex with me, so why he to that which I love? Firefly. Futurama. Why?"


Monday, March 23, 2009

Song of Healing

So, I haven't posted in forever, but anyway. Just had the totally most awesome experience with the piano. For the president's award, I needed to pick a skill to build up, and I had heard a few super awesome video game songs for the piano, so I thought I would learn piano! The very first song I properly learned for the piano was "Song of Healing", composed by Koji Kondo for the Videogame "Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask". Can I just say, I am a GIANT Legend of Zelda fan. "Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening" for the Game Boy was the very first videogame I ever even played. And "Majora's Mask" Is my favorite game from the series, if not my favorite game full stop. The gameplay is a little short, but the storytelling is fantastic. The game has a lot of side-quests, which accumulates in you earning a bunch of masks. I shall explain why this song is relevant, and why I think it is awesome.

The game starts off with the protagonist, Link, searching for his old friend, Navi the fairy, who helped him in his previous quest to save Hyrule, but then left once the adventure was over for reasons never fully explained (In a mysterious, bittersweet kind of way, not just a plot hole.). He is searching through the Lost woods, when he is flung off his horse and knocked unconcious. A humanoid creature lurks forward from the trees, bearing the appearance of a scarecrow, wearing a purple, spiked mask (3 guesses for who it belongs to, it starts with an M and end with ajora). He searches Link's belongings, and steals the Ocarina of Time, a gift from the princess of Hyrule, filled with bittersweet memories and emotional significance, and contained great power. (The name of the previous game was Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time, for just an idea.) And the Skull kid steals it. By this time, Link has regained conciousness and the cruel skull kid leaps on his horse and rides off, with Link in hot pursuit. You follow the cretin through a twisting area, culminating in a fall through a great abyss, landing softly after a long fall. The skull kid is awaiting you, floating casually across you from a lake. He torments you, giggling as he tells you how he killed your horse, and then rattles his head like a maraca, accompanied by an insane fit of the giggles. The rattling curses you, and you become a Deku. Basically, our dear Link has turned into wood, a veritable pinnochio. You chase him through a twisting corridor, and eventually, find yourself in the most unlikely of places: A clock tower. A strange (Very strange) man approaches you, and knows of your cursed condition. He explains that the Skull Kid stole Majora's mask from him, and offers to remove your curse if you can get his mask back. Long story short, you find the skull kid, knock the ocarina out of his hands, and through it's previously mentioned magnificent power, manage to reverse the three days you spend tracking him down. You return to the Bizzare man, and he plays you this song, The song of Healing. You play it back to him, and are returned to your human form. You, however, neglect to mention that you got your ocarina back, but not his mask, resulting in him violently shaking you. Good times ensue.

That was a crappy explanation of it, the full intro to the game can be seen Here, Here, and Here.
The part where you are returned to human form can be seen Here
There is just something about being lost and lonely, having all you knew stripped of you, arriving in a strange land, and being turned into something you were never meant to be resonates deeply with my heart. And in the end, you are returned to your former self, able to take on the challenges you are presented with. I think it's a wonderful intro to a game. 
Anyway, back to the piano-ness. So, this was the first proper song I ever learnt on the piano. I loved learning it, loved playing it, and played it regularly. But as I have taken up grades, my spare time to play things I want to play has dwindled, and mostly died. I sat down, and remembered this song. I wanted to play it. I knew the opening melody off by heart, but how much of the song remained in my mind? I played the opening bars, only to find the notes quickly escaping me, just out of reach, like a sense of shame at not being able to remember the face of a friend from your childhood. I pressed on. I followed the melody as best I knew, and then worked and struggled with the left hand accompaniment. every few moments, my toil was rewarded, and my emotions drove my fingers to venture to where my brain could not, enfeebled by lack of practice, like a muscle that has atrophied. I worked and worked at the music, until I hit a roadblock. I had fully recalled the right hand melody, but the left hand accompaniment remained out of recall. I would play a few bars of music, and I would reach a dead end. There were sharps and flats involved, but my fingers did not know exactly there they fell. I replayed the same bars over and over, but the notes were nowhere to be found.  I despaired. And in that despair I stormed the ramparts of my recollection, playing more with my heart than my brain, and my hands suddenly knew where to go, without a thought. Music flowed from my fingertips, and my heart was very glad to hear this song again, like the voice of a long-lost friend. In my tempo, in my way, the way I learned it, and the way I loved it.  Sometimes piano can seem like a chore, but when I am working at what I want to learn, it is a wonderful experience.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Disc Eiffel Ship

So, I just got back from a little discipleship thingy with my youth pastor, Jonathan Shaw, it was quite good! For those of you who don't know what discipleship is, allow me to educate you in very minor detail, as I don't know much about it myself.  Apparently, it is when someone who is a little older in their faith as a follower of Jesus decides to take someone younger in their faith "Under their wing" so to speak, like an older mentor sort of thing, and meet up with them on a regular basis to discuss life, faith, and everything from "Life to Relationships to Homophobia to catching a bus, or even making pizza!" As he said, quite eloquently. It's really a great oppurtunity for me, I'm feeling quite grateful, even honored, though truth be told I don't know why he chose me instead of someone else, I mean, all the other guys in the youth group are sound as a pound, so it's beyond me! Well, it's me and a friend of mine, Damian are currently getting mentored, to be precise. It's a nice oppurtunity to be honest about your faith without worrying what people are gonna think, or afraid that you won't be allowed to leave until it's "fixed". I'm looking forward to this! We're meeting up bi-weekly at the moment, and I'd always kinda hoped for a discipleship thingy like this. Jonathan's quite the example anyway, always very kind and patient. And he landed me that sweet public speaking gig so I'm looking forward to learning more from him!


Had Nexus over last night (Having, really, he's here right now. Say something, Nexus! )

Nexus Saaaaaaaays: Lost the game!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:P

He came to the super-awesome youth club I attend, X-IT, at grosvenor, it was quite the awesome! Good times had by all.

We just made delicious pancakes (American style, fo' shizzle) and they were scrumptious. SCRUMPTIOUS!
Anyway, I'm going to stop being antisocial and actually do stuff with dear Nexus now. He needs to start blogging again

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

General Stuffs

Like I said, running out of clever title names. At any rate, I haven't done a post on what's goin' down in my life in general in a little while, so I thought I'd update a little. I got both a new bike, and a new phone, the cost of both running just under 500 euro, so not too shabby all things considered.

The phone is the LG "KF310" model, and all things considered was quite a good buy! It's got a super awesome sliding screen thing, which means I can just turn it sideways and push it against my head when I want to hang up after a call! It's got all the nifty gadgets a phone should have, and what's more, skype and MSN messenger! I was really looking forward to getting skype on this phone, because apparently 3 are cheap on texts, pricey on calls. And skype calls, even to non-skype, are dirt cheap! I have now also gotten the hang of predictive text, it was a thousand times simpler than I thought it would be and is insanely useful. I haven't really needed the oppurtunity to use the MSN function yet, but I'm sure that's useful as well. :P And also, the day has finally come when they give you more money than you pay for for buying a new phone. This one was quite affordable at around 75 Euro, and came with 120 euro free credit. It's given to you in 10 euro monthly installments, but it suits my needs just fine. I think when the credit runs out, I think I'm just going to give this one away and get a new one, it will still be cheaper than paying for credit, all things considered! The phone is quite nice, but has a bit of a short battery life lasting around 3-4 days with minimal usage, and the camera is really for snapshots only, but that's hardly a problem, and at only 75 euro, I'd reccomend it! Affordable, flexible, and you can slam it shut on the side of your head. Who could ever ask for more?

In bike related news, for about a week, I was riding my mom's old bike. Now when I say old, I mean Old. It's a piece of lovely machinery with a futuristic look that seems to have fallen out of the 80's, and that in and of itself was something of an endearment. It also had a light generator on it, which made cycling difficult, but the concept of generating my own electricity was just awesome. Me and my brother occaisionally are bereft of bikes for brief periods of time, due to theft, flat tires, and the like, and so we both know the one problem this bike suffers, which is explained in the name that we have affectionately bestowed upon it: Bonerattler. The bike, unfortunately, has absolutely no shocks whatsoever. Which kinda makes biking more fun as you gently hum to yourself over bumps in the road, hearing your voice vibrate to it's own tune. The brakes were allright, all things considered, and I actually wouldn'tve minded keeping it, but alas, as I said, this was my mother's bike (although she has not ridden any two-wheeled mode of transport in several years), and so I had to return it eventually. My dear dad came across a secondhand bike, a "Trek" one, if I recall, for 390 Euro. Not bad, apparently the bike is some sort of greek adonis of bicycles, but due to it's secondhand (Although hardly used) Nature, my dad managed to find it at quite an affordable price! I spent some time looking for bikes myself, in my defense, but my dad has a nose for this sort of thing, so it came as no surprise that he found the better deal than I. In the end, I've got a new bike that works just fine, but part of me misses the old clanky Bonerattler. I've definately learned more gratitude for what I have, from the fancy secondhand bike to the clanky ol' Bonerattler, and I love them both very much. I'll let you guys know if I end up getting a name for the new one! 

On a different note, I saw the most beautiful bird today, I do believe it was a raven. It was an absolutely beautiful black beast of a bird, with a body as black as midnight and feathers iridescent of purple and black. Really, quite a spectacular fowl. I kept trying to get a picture of him with my new phone, but like I said, it really is only for snapshots, so it didn't work out. I've got a snapshot of him in my mind though, and that shan't be dissapearing anytime soon.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Denno Coil - A circle of children

So, I just finished watching a really great anime called "Denno Coil" with my brother! The kinda crappy news is that, because I don't believe in video piracy, my brother had to lie to me to get me to watch it. Licenced on veoh, my rump. But I suppose video piracy is a blog for another day. 

At any rate, about this anime. It's really good! It revolves around a group of pre-teen children, with age ranges from about 7-12, so you would think that the series would  be very airy and kinda dumb at heart, but it's not! As is with most anime, the first season is more lighthearted and sets up plot for the second season, which is darker and more plot-related, as opposed to the wacky hijiinks of the first season. It takes place in the near future, 2026, and revolves around a group of children who all have Augmented reality devices, which take form in video glasses they wear, which allows them to access cyberspace. Interestingly, the cyberspace also affects them, with "Illegal" programs in high demand for their components. The world is split in two, "Updated space" and "obsolete space", which is regularly updated to "Updated space" by the software company the produces the glasses. But all the fun stuff comes from the "Obsolete space", where illegal programs roam free, until they are hunted down by little children with a heafty dose of spunk and attitude! 

The First season is really great, and has some light humour while establishing characters with very distinct personalities, and occaisionally touching the softer notes of human emotion, like loss and memories. The Second season is far better, if you are of a more mature audience, with plot points planted in the first season ripened and harvested with addictive mystery and consequence. It's really great, the second season has moments that really bring you to tears, it's very deeply touching. They talk a lot about distance and disconnection from people and reality, and it's all very relevant and eloquently put, when the kids venture into literally forbidden territory, the "Coil Space", where the more dangerous programs roam, which possess the ability to seperate your conciousness from your earthly body, inducing a coma. The show has a lot of mystery elements, keeping you laughing while wondering what's really going on behind the scences. It's interesting, pulls at your heart, and if nothing else, is adorable without relent. It's definately in my top 5 Anime of all time!

Also, I forgot to mention, at one point it has a Little girl's cybernetic beard commit nuclear warfare on the girl's face. Top that, suckas!

Monday, March 2, 2009


Only time for a short blog post, I'm afraid. I'm busy, needing to practice piano more. It's frustrating, I'm thinking of dropping grades, keeping lessons, and just learning songs I want to learn instead, if that's possible. Also, I'm reading "Wild at Heart" just after reading "Irresistable Revolution" by Shane Claiborne. I would reccomend IR, it's really a fantastic book for any christian, EVER. I'll probaly blog about it when spare time becomes available again. Not liking "Wild at Heart" so far, it's supposed to be a book about being a christian MAN for God, but it's coming off a little Duke-Nukem, like you're not really a man as God wants you to be unless you're a lumberjack who chops down bears instead of trees. He mentions three things as core to a man's soul: 
1) A battle to fight
2)An adventure to follow
3) A beauty to rescue

He is certain that adam, yes, even adam, had the desire to fight things instilled in him. I think we will all be dissapointed when we go to heaven and there's no more things to punch, if that is the case. And he doesn't mean it very metaphoricly, he really does see violence as a good part of human nature. Unless you're a peacekeeper or something. But who wants to be "Soft". (I'm not kidding, he says this.) I'm shocked at his sexist attitudes, and his certainty of his correctness. The last part is pretty wrong too, in my opinion. Jesus said it was better not to marry (If it was something you could do and still be happy, keep in mind), and paul, who was celibate, wrote half the new testament. He was certain, I am not kidding here, absolutely certain that Jesus was more like Braveheart than Mother Teresa. William wallace, who fought to liberate the scots by leading a bloody, although some would say deserved, war, simply cannot compare to that silly old nun who devoted her entire life to helping the poor, hungry, the diseased, the outcasts. I am not even kidding here. The book is currently filling me with a bizzare mix of shame and anger. Shame at my apparent lack of maddening testosterone, and rage that such sexist, emotionally driven words are advocated. It's driving me crazy, it has compelled me to actually verbally groan and growl at those words. Some of what he says is true, but when it comes to manhood, I think this guy needs to realise that although Jesus is coming at the end of time with a two-edged sword, in a cloak covered in blood, that his sword is not our sword to wield, that he who lives by the sword dies by the sword, and only one who has beaten death deserves to wield it. Bleh. He called a general blowing up a house full of nazis a parable. Frustrating. Short blog post, heh.